"It's like we're a science experiment..."

Have you ever awakened from a dream speaking out loud? It has happened to me a few handfuls of times throughout my life. The most recent experience of this for me was this morning. The words I said audibly, but at a whisper, were; “It’s like we’re a science experiment.” Had I not remembered clearly what I was dreaming about, I might have thought it was some subconscious venting of my experience of getting fillings at the dentist the day before, but I remembered quite clearly my dream. I was dreaming of being in a counseling appointment with someone I know. I dreamed clearly that the person had a sudden and highly piqued curious about themselves, why they experience their emotions the way they do, react to others the way they do and I was explaining to them, the best I could, my understanding of psychology, diagnosis and the diagnostic and statistical Manual (DSM=V.)

               This dream is not far from reality as I have recently had conversations with clients about diagnosis and the DSM-V, or as I have endearingly echoed the voice of past professors by referring to it as, “The magical book of witchcraft.” Why did that professor refer to a revered book in such a way? Likely, because it isn’t overly scientific, and neither is magic or witchcraft. Perhaps it is more an applied pseudo-science. This is coming from someone who adores pseudoscience and science alike, but this blog is not about the DSM-V, the scientific method or diagnosis. This blog is about science experiments and how we conduct them with ourselves unknowingly as human beings.

               Do you remember studying about the scientific method in grade school? You probably do. The particularly exciting, and mildly dreadful, reality of science is that it is never truly settled. It is forever unfolding, evolving and developing: if we let it and if we want it to do so. Sometimes we do not; for various reasons. Science can be manipulated. This is not an expression of postmodernism slop either, but an objective recognition that long lasting beliefs and perceived reality can change; and do.  The model is a process of exploring assumptions, researching and testing them to see if the data gathered and applied supports and proves that your research and assumption are passing by the test. Then we get to share the results! Counseling can be a lot like this model and so can simply living our life.

               For example, remembering Jahari’s window, and considering that you and I were in a therapeutic relationship, there is information that you and I know mutually about you. There may be information that I know about you that you do not know. There may be information that You know about you that I do not know. Finally, there is information that neither of us know about you. If a client withholds relatively important information about themselves from the therapeutic process, which they 100% have the right to do, the results of therapy may be slightly skewed; perhaps from their initial goal. More often than not, neither a client nor a therapist fully understand why a client is pursuing therapy in the first place. They may both have an inkling or an idea and an initial goal, but the precipitating event or events that occurred prior to an initial evaluation are often only a clue as to a deeper issue and reason someone is present in therapy.

               Prior to scheduling and attending my dentist appointment, I had catastrophized, due to some pain and other symptoms, that I would absolutely need a root canal; and potentially a tooth extraction. My belief that I created changed my perception of pain and discomfort, altered my nervous system and had me preparing for the worst. This is how beliefs work. Remember, a belief is simply a thought rehearsed perpetually with some emotion attached to it. Not all beliefs are fact or reality. Upon getting a diagnostic exam and a series of several X-Rays, my dentist determined that my teeth were in excellent condition; save two small surface level cavities that needed filling. No tooth infection, no root canal, no extraction. The pain was from nerve bruising and some common subconscious  nocturnal bruxism; probably time for some self-hypnosis. Do you see what happened here? The same experience in reverse could have happened. I could have gone in with a different set of beliefs, perhaps more hopeful than those I had, and been unpleasantly surprised.

               The same is true of the therapeutic process. Sometimes we learn things about ourselves. Sometimes those things are mildly, or even wildly uncomfortable. We are going through a series of experiments with ourselves and with a therapist. My preference is to make the process as painless and pleasant as possible. Just as my dentist was sure to use a generous dose of lidocaine gel prior to injecting Novocaine so that the drilling and filling was only mildly uncomfortable. His bedside manor helps tremendously as well, which helps with the psychology and emotions. This is always my desire for clients. To have supreme long-lasting change to occur with as little discomfort as possible. Undoubtedly, some discomfort can occur, but this is also part of change. It is the curiosity one has about themselves that stimulates the desire for further exploration. While a DSM-V diagnosis my help us bill a client’s health insurance and perhaps be a stepping stone in pursuing further testing from a psychiatrist or using different inventories or assessments, it does not facilitate imaging, blood work, urine work, or brain scans: It is simply a guide.

               I dream of people awakening with curiosity about themselves. I dream of others asking the tough questions and starting their own healthy experiments in pursuing therapy and continuing these experiments, with efficiency and dedication, outside of the therapy office; with their loved ones, themselves and the world around them. Therapy is one of the many helpful tools in the universal tool belt for change. Sometimes, it is the exact tool needed to accomplish a timely life goal. Afterall, we are a bit of a science experiment.