5 things that distract or disrupt us from getting the most from our therapeutic experience.

1)  Starting & stopping therapy frequently or having chronic cancellations & reschedules.

All our therapists do, or at least should, understand that life happens. Even with all of life's events there is also a certain level of continuity of care with therapy. Sometimes, family members pass away, insurance plans change, job loss occurs, and other significant crisis type life events. These experiences are undoubtedly understood and sometimes make us pause our therapeutic journey with our therapists. However, when these crisis life events are not present, and we are often rescheduling or canceling our appointments, it can break up the momentum and continuity of care with our therapist. We don't want to become avoidant. Chronic cancellation and rescheduling can point to a potential subconscious message that we don't truly care about our therapy or the change that we want in our life. Sometimes, therapy is uncomfortable, and even momentarily painful. However, just like going to the gym or exercising or changing our dietary intake, sometimes we have to press through momentary discomfort to gain the goals & desires that we long for the most.

From the start of therapy, we should have a plan, goal and treatment plan with our therapists, so we know some semblance of the direction of the journey

2) Over focus on political or world event themed content

While it may be fascinating, interesting, or even passionate content of the client, it often has very little to do with the treatment plan and the initial reason for therapy.

Whether our political beliefs, world perspectives, or personal interests, align / agree, or are very far from the belief systems of our therapists, ultimately it is not the reason for outpatient mental health counseling. We have an incredible opportunity to work through the initial problem area in our lives while potentially grazing the topics of politics and events of the world, but always redirecting the conversation back to the initial reason of how those issues are impacting our life directly. Our therapists can help us grow in what we can do to be empowered, sovereign, and autonomous as an individual, family or community; resolving our initial problems that brought us into therapy.

3) Obsessive self-diagnosis or over identification with a diagnosis.

While licensed professional counselors (LPCs,) licensed social workers (LMSWs) and psychologists are trained & certified to provide medical diagnosis for insurance billing purposes, it is important to remember that a diagnosis is only a symbol or sign pointing to a much larger experience. It is your therapist’s job and duty to point you towards the very best version of yourself. Our therapists can help guide us with solutions, validation, and support; not helping the client over identify with the problem or helping the client build their identity around what they perceived to be the problem. Over identifying with a diagnosis steeps us in what identifies the very thing that is keeping us from the most self-actualized version of ourselves. A diagnosis helps as a sign to point us in a New direction of the healthiest version of ourselves; not a new identity. Autonomy, sovereignty, independence, and self-reliance is the ultimate goal.

4)  Speaking excessively about AI (artificial intelligence) responses, social media content or over-reminiscing about former therapists & their techniques or approaches. 

While it is true that we often only get to meet with our therapists for approximately an hour a week and there are a multitude of hours to occur prior to our next appointment, our therapist desires to utilize that sacred hour for accomplishing powerful work in real time with you Based upon who you are, your experiences, your own organic thoughts, and the thoughts, training & treatment plan of the therapist. AI & social media may be fun and interesting, but they often have very little to do with our therapeutic process. Upon our initial intake, it may be beneficial to bring up to our therapist what has worked in the past with other therapists, techniques, orientations and approaches. Bringing up our past therapeutic journeys well into our current journey with our new therapist simply detracts from the new process in which we have engaged with them.

5)  Avoiding speaking about the real issue or core problem that brought us to therapy.

While it is incredibly important that we develop a secure sense of trust with our therapist, it is important for us to eventually return to the true subject and the real issue of why we are in therapy. Sometimes, this takes time. It may even take several sessions or a couple months to feel safe and comfortable to discuss the real problem. Our therapist is trained to gently, gracefully and supportively, bring us back to the topic of the real problem. They do this purely for the purposes of how to process, navigate, mitigate and aid in helping us solve this problem: to result in the most optimal quality of life possible. Keeping in mind that life can change swiftly and new life content can arise frequently in therapy, our therapists want to be certain that they are aiding us in our issues resulting in treatment goals being met.

Therapy can at times be complicated, nuanced and diverse for people who receive its benefits. However, with an excellent therapist equipped and trained to provide excellent services, therapy should bring us into the new freedom-filled type of life that we desire with a new sense of empowerment, ability to love self & others and have a sound mind.