Sometimes a person entertaining the idea of going to counseling can be riddled with different thoughts and emotions about the process. Whether they are feeling like a failure for having to go, feeling fearful or embarrassed about what is happening in their life, fear of being diagnosed or even the fear of a copay expense, there are plenty of reasons for someone to have apprehension. While all of these are valid, and a good therapist will set their mind at ease in the initial contact call, there are other ways to approach these fears and gain a sense of control and autonomy while approaching the therapeutic process as well as during and after appointments. Here are 5 thoughts to remember
1) You are brave & empowered for going; not a failure:
Regardless of mental health stigma, many people still have a sense of failure or last resort in their pursuing therapy. Avoiding therapy may lead to more perceived failure in life. Approaching therapy with proactive courage will lead to greater personal success. People of all different walks of life pursue therapy with me! Liberals, conservatives, believers of all types, agnostics and atheists, blue blooded hard working tell-it-to-me-straight folks, complex white-collar executives, men, women, white, black, Asian, American, gay & straight: people are people and come to me to resolve their problems and trust me to provide help. A good therapist helps people help themselves; so when they’re away, the other 167 hours in the week, they have a plan to experience and work towards improvement in their life!
2) Your therapist isn’t there to judge you, but to encourage, guide, support & sometimes exhort you:
Sometimes, our own self judgement comes out in therapy. The best way to navigate this is through self-acceptance. While there may be ways within your life you desire to change, and may need to, you get to accept yourself and who you are at your core; which ultimately leads to change. Your good therapist will always work towards encouraging you, gently and cautiously guiding you so you have your own hands on the wheel of your life. Your good therapist will be there to support you and, often times to hold you accountable to your original true goals that may seem less attractive as time moves on. Your good therapist will desire the best for you and bring out the best in you.
3) You are your own person, it really doesn’t always matter what your therapist thinks- You are autonomous, independent and in control
While a therapist does have licensure and extensive years of training to give you the very best service possible, the good therapist will desire to empower you to live the healthiest and best version of YOUR life; not the life they wish you had or think you should have. Sometimes your good therapist may have a desire for your life and encourage you in a direction that doesn’t always feel authentic to you. Guess what? You have the liberty to speak up and say so, or to politely smile and let it go out the other ear. Ultimately, you know your own life well. We are here to gracefully guide you through blind spots you may be unaware of so you can get to what you really want.
4) Therapy is an investment, and you are worth it
Whether you are utilizing your hard-earned health insurance or paying privately out of pocket, there is always some skin in the game in the process of receiving help: that’s what makes it worth it to many clients! Remember, you often get what you pay for. Whether it’s a $20 copay or a $200 plus investment, you are worth it! Whether you’re buying an expensive meal, a load of groceries for your family, a new car to transport you to and from work, seeing a doctor or a specialist, there is an exchange of funds. Your mental health is often like the well pump, furnace, a/c unit of your house or even the insulation. Neglect it, and it will not serve you long term. Sometimes a swift quick investment will get you through another year or decade!
5) Therapy is not a death sentence, but a hidden blessing that can be often for a short season
Remember, a good therapist is there to help you FIX YOURSELF. While it can be nice to have someone to vent to and dump out the stresses of life (which can certainly be a PART of therapy from time to time,) you want a therapist who will be there to give you the tools, tips, tricks, techniques and awaken self- realization so you can move on into the next phase of your life past the current challenges. Therapy does not need to be for years and decades. Sometimes, therapy is for weeks or months. Some people go to 3 to 4 appointments and are ready to move on; because their issues are resolved. Some people benefit from being a life long client on and off through their life. This is where counseling may morph a bit more into coaching.
Final Thought:
Ultimately, therapy is FOR YOU. You get to utilize it the way you need it most. You get to seek out the sort of therapist you prefer and avoid the sorts of therapists you know you wouldn’t want to have for therapy services. You get to be empowered, and then, keep making life great again by fixing yourself in all the ways you knew how to prior to therapy, discoveries you made during therapy and the new you that has been birthed in the process of therapeutic change.
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